“Maybe it is because they don’t understand
or trust each other . . .
Maybe it is because they don’t understand
or trust themselves.”
This quote comes from my little Children’s-Adult book “Purple if for Searching.” It is an answer to a question about why nations go to war.
Trust is, as many things we will discuss, a complicated issue. Perhaps trust is most fundamentally about what a child feels when they enter this world — their trust of their parents is a pure as it gets…. we all had that once — maybe only for a short while;l if we were lucky, for much longer than that.
Trust, after our start in life, comes from experience. If our experiences have been positive and supportive, we trust more naturally; if not…
How trusting can a child who has been consistently neglected be? Abused? Screamed at?
How trusting is a woman who has been raped? Harassed? Put down? Treated less than?
How trusting are those who have been cheated upon? Pushed around? Bullied? Told they were less than?
We want to trust. We truly hope others trust us. But really, it isn’t always so easy for many of us.
If you have read early versions of this blog, you will remember the “Black-haired Beauty” posts. Yes, Arwen, is still with us — now a grand old dame. Unfortunately, she is pretty sick with cancer and we are enjoying each day we have with her. She has been a model of how trust grows from kindness.
I think we can learn a good bit from dogs/pets. I had dogs in the family growing up and now as an adult with Arwen. I have seen the scope of how life has treated them. We had a shelter Beagle who had been so badly abused he would run under a bed and cower, thumping his tail loudly if you even raised your hand. Thumper had been badly abused.
Arwen is at the other end of the spectrum — she’s been loved, cared for, and treated the best we possibly could. She’s responded in kind.
Trust is something that weaves through our lives and those of us who have issues with it, it is because of how we have been treated. We struggle with it every day. In some ways it is a relearning process. Thumper eventually got much better; but I doubt he ever forgot.
As a Nation and a World we are struggling with trust today. It almost seems like people don’t think it is important any more. Folks… it has never been more important.
The best we can do is show the world the kindness it takes to bring trust back and to reject all that negativity breeds. That’s our task — every day — be trustworthy, be kind, choose positivity. Maybe someone will notice.